Tough Guys Wear Pink

School shootings and other forms of school violence are rarely performed by females. Why is this? Males have a reputation to be these tough people who remain strong through thick and thin, but in reality, males are a lot more sensitive then they appear to be. When someone calls a male a "fag" or other terms that imply that the male is homosexual or feminine, the victim feels threatened because someone had questioned his masculinity. Males respond to these kind of things by fighting or even taking it to the extreme of shooting. Females are rarely the shooters. This is because females have a different reaction to "drama" than males do. Unlike males, females tend to be passive aggressive, and they work their way to the top of the social ladder by manipulating others.

Like males, females are pressured to look and act a certain way in order to be seen with the right crowd and gain respect from their peers. The movie "Mean Girls" depicts life in girl world. The video below is an analysis of the movie with the author of Queen Bees & Wannabes, the book in which "Mean Girls" was based.

What is beauty?

The Dove campaign for natural beauty is a major wake-up call for Americans to be less naive about the 'perfect image.' Americans have been brainwashed to believe that people need to look a certain way in order to fit in with others. The media is the biggest influence on the way people choose to dress themselves, etc. We, as Americans, put the fittest and prettiest people on pedestals and copy the things that they do.

On T.V. shows like Desperate Housewives, the 21st century American housewife is depicted through the main characters. People who do not look like the housewives feel like outcasts because the women who are on the show are very pretty and very fit. Sitcoms like Modern Family have a more accurate depiction of today's society, and the characters lead normal lives. In America, beauty is defined by the amount of make-up a girl wears or the athletic ability of a man. This is not the case for all countries. A year or two ago, Oprah had  Mara Schiavocampo on her show after Mara went around the world in search of the true definition of beauty.  After traveling to five different continents, Mara discovered that beauty can be interpreted in countless ways. In America and Brazil, people measure beauty by the person's body. People who want to be beautiful value exercise and will use plastic surgery if that's what it takes to get their dream figure. These two countries have perform the most plastic surgeries in the world. Japanese women use collagen to improve their skin because skin is their token to true beauty. The women of the Kayan tribe near Thailand and Burma use rings to elongate her neck. These are just a few examples of different forms of beauty. For more information, here is the link to the episode's summary.

Girls Gone Wild!

Forget food, water, and oxygen! Nature and nurture are much more important! They aid in survival for all animals, mainly humans. Studies have shown that children who are neglected while they are babies develop much slower than children who receive proper care throughout their early years. Child neglect causes retardation and stunts brain development. In an episode of The Oprah Winfrey Show, Danielle, a feral child, was found in an abandoned house and she did not have the ability to communicate with the policemen who found her. After being nurtured by her foster family, Danielle has been slowly but surely gaining the ability to function in the real world. Nature and nurture are important because today's society has transformed from diverse to "survival of the fittest." If a person does not have the ability to communicate, he/she will have a very hard time fitting in society because they do not have the proper socialization basics that a majority of people receive at young ages. In the articles given in class, one can learn that people are the biggest influence that humans depend on for growth. Family, friends, and co-workers give people an identity, and the types of environments people surround themselves with affect the way their children act. Because I was raised in an upper-middle class family, I have been extremely disciplined by my parents. They set high expectations for me, and I would never do anything that would make people think less of me because I want to maintain a good reputation. I have to act a certain way around my grandparents. For example, when my grandpa asks me how I'm doing, I am expected to respond with "I'm fine thanks, how are you?" under all circumstances. I follow these guidelines subconsciously because as an obedient person, I avoid trouble when possible.

We're Tuesday people!

In class, we watched the movie "Tuesdays with Morrie." This is the story about a stereotypical businessman, Mitch Albom, whose life is taken over by his job. Mitch's Sociology teacher, Morrie Schwartz, contracts ALS and gradually dies throughout the course of the movie. After many Tuesday meetings with Morrie, Mitch learns from Morrie that "when you learn how to die, you learn how to live." Mitch puts his work and girlfriend on hold while he waits for Morrie to die. Morrie told Mitch to live his life while he's young because Mitch was lucky to have so much time and good health. Morrie gives Mitch the ultimate reality check. Obviously death tears people apart. Morrie reminds Mitch that "death ends life, not a relationship." Death could never break the strong relationship that people have with their loved ones. Although they are literally apart, people are always figuratively together in heart. You can't live your life waiting for people to die. When my nana's sister was dying, it totally drained everybody in my family because she was dying for over a year. I was not allowed to go visit after a certain point because my mom didn't want my sister or me to remember our aunt at the near-death state. Like Morrie, my Aunt Irene had high spirits until the day she died. My mom made meatballs from my aunt's recipe one day and brought it to her in the nursing home. My aunt was able to tell that my mom didn't add all of the lemons that the recipe called for. If you talked to her on the phone, you would never know that she was dying. Her memory was never impaired either. She could talk about the trip she took to Europe 20 years before she died. My family was not able to look past the good things that Aunt Irene was still able to contribute, and they were constantly worrying. The day she died, a weight was lifted off the family because remembering seemed to be a lot easier than constant caring. I don't think this is the way death is supposed to be. I believe people should spend more time living in the moment. Waiting around for death is too draining, and wishing the loved one was still living is also draining. Hopefully American culture will generate a new view of death to make it easier on people!

Cultural Confusion

After discussing American culture with my classmates, I realized that Americans do not have a culture to call their own. From the Revolutionary War to the present, Americans have valued diversity; therefore, America has transformed from British colonies to a cultural melting pot.  Although there are some classic American icons such as a hot dog or a Chevrolet automobile, there is no right or wrong way that a person can "Americanize" him/herself. People in America have the freedom to express themselves with their religion or hobbies/interests.

Like America, my high school does not have a distinct culture because there are so many different types of people who attend the school. There is so much opportunity for students, and everybody belongs do different clubs or plays different sports. The cliques formed in school make it hard to pinpoint a specific culture type for my school. Furthermore, all high schools have cliques, and people have to find where they belong in the high school society.  

Speaking Un-spoken Languages

This picture was taken in China by my uncle.

People can say so much without even opening their mouths. In class, we discussed gestures that are interpreted differently depending on a person's native country. I had no idea that certain gestures could be offensive to someone in another nation! A couple years ago, my dad took a trip to Egypt. Unlike Americans, Egyptians expect tips for a lot more than just serving food in a restaurant or parking a car in a valet service. Doing a favor for someone (i.e. showing someone where bathroom is or holding a door open) is worthy of gratuity. If a person does not tip, he or she is considered rude or disrespectful. On the other hand, the Chinese are less greedy. In fact, when my dad took a trip to China last year, he said the Chinese were very hospitable. My dad went on the business trip with his brother, an experienced traveller. Since my uncle had been to China multiple times before, he insisted that my dad learn Chinese before going on the trip because the Chinese are honored when someone takes the time to learn their language. When my dad and uncle would go to dinner with the business associates, the associates would wait until the guests ate before they would eat the meals themselves. My dad felt bad because he would wait to eat until the server brought him steamed rice, but the Chinese insisted on waiting! Both of these experiences were culture shock for my dad. After living in America and following American rituals for such a long time, it was a strange adjustment for my dad! My uncle does A LOT of traveling in the Middle East, so I can find out about more cultural differences.

Humanitarian of the Year

The other night, I attended a training for PADS. In the hour that I was there, I learned so much about poverty in my community. When I was given a tour of the HOPE Center facility, I didn't realize that the Journeys program had so much to offer. From showers to psychologists, the people who are homeless or at risk of becoming homeless can get so much help from this center. Another cool service that the foundation offers is the condos that people can live in so they can learn to get back on their feet. The leader of the tour explained that the poverty rate was increasing while the funding of the Journeys foundation was lower than ever. Luckily, big companies like Starbucks and Red Lobster donate food to Journeys multiple times during the week. I used to donate my old clothes to a veterans foundation, but I am going to start donating my clothes to the HOPE Center.  There is a closet full of clothes that people have donated, but the foundation is always looking for more. The closet had a variety of clothing for people who are businessmen or even babies! There was also a play area for little kids. One thing that the trainer made very clear was that the homeless people that we typically find in the north shore are people that we cannot pick out as homeless. He explained that, like me, most people give homeless people the stereotype of a dirty person who sits on the street with a can begging for money. In Buffalo Grove, you could be standing in line at a Starbucks with a homeless person, and you would never know the person was homeless. I am looking forward to working with people who are in poverty because I have never done volunteer work like this before. I am used to either working with little kids or the elderly. I am glad that I am branching out to help a different group of people.

Without PADS, people would not understand that homeless people are just like you and me. Some people just struggle more than others. PADS teaches us to lend a helping hand to the homeless, or there will be consequences... Watch this video to get an understanding of how not to treat the homeless! http://www.comedycentral.com/videos/index.jhtml?videoId=209909&title=homeless-attack